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I tried to post this to the TCS list, but it was rejected. -sigh- Anyway, enjoy:

The better you know someone, and the better they know you, the more intimate things it is safe to tell them. Which meshes amazingly well with a gradual approach to relationships, and extremely poorly with any sort of discontinuous jump.

By the way, this is important to parents who've messed up in the past, and now have an older child but little relationship. "Come tell me all about you, so we can catch up," would be just the wrong thing to say.

Elliot Temple on March 30, 2003

Comments (5)

How would a parent start getting to know the child if not by asking about him?

Anonymous at 8:01 AM on September 12, 2009 | #1903
why was it rejected from tcs list? any ideas?

Anonymous at 5:33 PM on January 31, 2016 | #4763
> How would a parent start getting to know the child if not by asking about him?

why did this person ask this question? seems confused. you weren't talking about whether or not a parent should ask his child questions to get to know him.

Anonymous at 5:34 PM on January 31, 2016 | #4764
> why was it rejected from tcs list? any ideas?

sarah's a bitch

Anonymous at 5:37 PM on January 31, 2016 | #4765
> How would a parent start getting to know the child if not by asking about him?

The parent should offer to help with whatever problem the child has now. He shouldn't expect the child to take a lot of time to explain stuff that isn't urgent to him now. By having more limited interactions the parent and child will gradually get to know what sort of stuff they can cooperate on so they both benefit.

Anonymous at 5:38 PM on January 31, 2016 | #4766

What do you think?

(This is a free speech zone!)